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Pro Shui

We've all seen pro wrestling - and recently there has been a rash of tables and chairs in the ring. I think pro wrestling has discovered Feng Shui.

ECW even has a stack of tables under the ring. The participants will go to this cache of tables 2 or 3 times in every match. It's overkill at first glance, but the audience really likes it. It isn't entertaining on TV, so my belief is the awesome power that Feng Shui generates is conferred to the audience somehow.

Here is just a sampling of Feng Shui for wrestlers:
  • A folding table perpendicular to the entrance gate lends energy to viewers.

  • A metal chair in the Northmost corner of the ring forecasts a victorious 'piledriver'.

  • A table propped up in the ring means bad luck is in store for the table.

  • A set of stairs placed at a 45 degree angle to the ring incites anger. People may feel the need to either throw the stairs themselves, or throw people at the stairs.

  • A folding chair to the base of the skull brings good fortune to the giver.

  • A table set up outside the ring, but inside the barricades invites both prone and plummeting atheletes.

  • An entrance portal should be located above the arena floor for maximum ratings.

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