Instruments: Synths, Percussion
Feel: Bouncy, Grooving
Interview-Mania! This piece does nothing and goes nowhere. Perfect for an energetic backdrop to your review or interview segments!
Instruments: Piano, Basses, Cellos, Flutes, Clarinets, Oboes, English Horn, Percussion
Feel: Dark, Driving, Intense
This is an awesome theme tune. For ANYthing. You got a dark comedy about an inept biologist? This will work. A gritty fantasy dealing with fairy politics? A sci-fi dystopian future where everyone likes sardines? A reality show about bicycle thieves? A slice-of-life serial about growing up in the Upper Peninsula? Seriously. Anything.
|Crossing the Chasm
"Crossing the Chasm"
Instruments: Drums, Basses, Cellos, Violas, Violins, Singer
Feel: Action, Dark, Driving
Adventure, Ho! Last time on "Adventure, Ho!", the mage-orc Gnarlnosh was granted 1d4 wishes from a Deck of Many Things and it totally screwed up the game balance. Why? Because the DM sort of sucks, but he thought "Oh, sure - this could be fun... how could giving a mage-orc a fully provisioned army in the middle of a desert possibly sidetrack the quest for finding a cure for a magical disease that is ruining the kingdom AND the healer elf." Deck of Many Things; BAH! More like Deck of This-Campaign-Jumped-the-Shark.
Instruments: Synths, Electric Piano
Feel: Calming, Relaxed
Imagine yourself floating in a beautiful sky, the aggressive badgers of the land do not bother you here at all. Todd from HR doesn't try to make small talk with you in this place, nor does he try to invite you to his kid's wrestling tournament that is being held at a school 90 minutes away. The coyote-lizards of your night terrors do not roam here, and you can clearly read the expiration dates on all your packages. Even the hand soap. Why does the hand soap have an expiration date? It matters not.
|March of the Spoons
"March of the Spoons"
Instruments: Bass Clarinet, Basses, Cellos, Violas, Violins, Flutes, Clarinets, Oboes, Drums
Feel: Bouncy, Grooving, Humorous
How can you tell if a piece of music is intended to be comedic? Pizzicato strings and a bass clarinet! This piece has it all! Pizzicato strings? Check! Bass clarinet? You bet! Throw in some staccato high winds and you got yourself a great comedic piece! Going out on a date and want to appear more entertaining? Bring a bass clarinet! Bass clarinet players I think also get discounts at T.G.I.Fridays; Double bonus!
Sheet Music: Available!
Instruments: Virginal, Dulcimer, Bass, Drums, Xylophone
Feel: Bouncy, Driving, Humorous
Hey buddy, wanna buy a ferret? How about a trained ferret? Okay, I didn't really train her... she just has a predisposition to things. She stuffs squirrels into boxes, feeds them sugary treats and then empties the boxes though mailslots. Well, if you're not going to buy her, how about some nails... to keep your mailslot closed.
Instruments: Synth, Cello, Piano, Choir
Feel: Calming, Relaxed, Somber
Ok, I might be crying a little bit. But it is understandable... I went to a party store, and I saw all the colorful balloons with happy sayings on them like "Get Well" and "Feel Better" and "A Hug for You"... I just started thinking how the helium will all be gone one day. Just gone... we won't get it back, and it took millions of years of radioactive decay to get the helium we have now... and... *sniff* we just don't have millions more years to wait for more. They're wasting helium in balloons... how can I possibly "Feel Better"!?
|Ascending the Vale
"Ascending the Vale"
Instruments: Harp, Choir, Flute Percussion, Anyafil Horn
Feel: Relaxed, Calming, Mystical
We've all been there... wandering through an impenetrable forest, half dead with 2 arrows sticking out of your leg. And yet we continue - because it is probably good for the narrative. Then hope! Oh thank the old gods and the new!! An unmapped settlement of woodland inhabitants takes you in and brings you back from the brink of certain death. You don't even care that it is a scurry of giant squirrels that came to the rescue, or that the healing soup they give you is largely acorn-based, and vomit-inducing. Pastoral and beautiful. The download comes with a loop for if you never want the feeling to end.
|River of Io
"River of Io"
Instruments: Flute, Clarinet, Strings, Percussion
Feel: Driving, Mysterious, Suspenseful
I would like to state, for the record, that this is the worst river cruise I've ever taken. The zombie crocodiles were bad enough, but the chase for the stolen artifact statue that was taken by the Ice Monkey Lord was really quite too much. And now I'm missing my left shoe. So why are we up sneaking around UFO landing sites? NONE OF THIS MAKES ANY SENSE!!! You got some clandestine stuff going on? This track will probably work for any sneakiness anywhere.
Instruments: Erhu, Pipa, Yangqin, Percussion
Feel: Bright, Relaxed
When I do music based on folk traditions, I tend to name them after cities. Like this one: Shenyang. It is a little village of 8 million people that I've somehow never heard of. Oh sure, I've heard the name, but I don't associate it with anything specific. Chicago: Hot Dogs. Amsterdam: Offensively tall Dutch. Moscow: "Stop a Douchebag". Shenyang: No clue. How did I miss this city?? You already know if you need this piece, it has a more satisfying low-end than actual real Chinese music, and it should fit in with your modern productions well.
|Fireflies and Stardust
"Fireflies and Stardust"
Instruments: Banjo, Violins, Mandolin, Guitars, Bass, Drums
Feel: Bright, Calming, Relaxed
Some beautiful rural americana-type music. I mean, just listen to that! It is an 8 piece ensemble, and everyone is playing a lot of notes, yet it remains so simple. Okay, the violins aren't playing that many notes... had to pick up the 2nd violin off the waiver wires, and there wasn't enough time to get her up to speed on the offense for this piece. So we made an executive decision, and kept things simple. We should still be able to get some good yardage here, and hope to win on defense.