Naming is very important when it comes to instrumental music. In this case, I wanted to make sure anyone making videos
of Lumpsuckers would find this. It may have been better served with a broad title having to do with slapstick comedy
or cute cats, but I think I got the lumpsucker market cornered!
Pimpled lumpsucker? Yup. Bumpy lumpsucker? You bet! Toad lumpsucker? Absolutely! All the lumpsuckers!

Hijinks, antics, shenanigan, tomfoolery! We got it all here for you! Solo out of tune piano for all of your slapstick needs! Sheet music available (More button). You can download this piece with all the parts plus bonus record-destressed version plus a normal piano – and all of these also at a faster tempo here!

Download Part 7 uncompressed here ($5.25)

Or get parts 1-7 and all the uncompressed parts over here for just $8.65! That’s a $35.07 value! So… like 75% savings if you get this… assuming you would have purchased each one individually.

Which reminds me! If you pledge $20 per month or more on Patreon, you would get all of the super high quality downloads for free at the end of every month. That is also quite a good deal! Plus it makes me feel good about myself… and I think we all want that!

At the intersection of relaxation and horror lies “The Ossuary”.
Part 6: Air
Well, something has taken a turn for the not-quite-as-good-as-I’d-like. Slow-moving drone of impending doom!

You can download the full non-compressed version here.

Download this piece in high quality here.

At the intersection of relaxation and horror lies “The Ossuary”.
Part 5: Rest
After some amount of introspection, I can only conclude that this is the afterlife, or some entryway to the afterlife… or a really cool club in the Meatpacking district after-hours. This is the most genuinely relaxing piece of the Ossuary suite… still has a bit of an edge.

At the intersection of relaxation and horror lies “The Ossuary”.
Part 4: Animate
It is coming for us!!!! ARGH!!!!! RUN! But where!?? Doesn’t matter! Try running at the walls!!! No good! They’re solid!! Is it still coming!? ARGH! Yup! There it is!!!! Now where!? The ladder!? NO GOOD COMES FROM CLIMBING A LADDER! You should know that by now! It’ll just break halfway up OR something will grab your ankle OR BOTH! Just save yourself! There’s no good us both getting eaten by that thing!!! Oh! And when you fill out the survey – this holiday was “VERY DISAPPOINTING!”

You can download the high-quality version of this piece with each of the parts here!

At the intersection of relaxation and horror lies “The Ossuary”.
Part 3: Words

Odd metals and percussion underscore the only piece in the series with a clear clean synth. There’s some amount of technology under this thing. The synth is quickly overtaken by the bizarre drones. Perfect for; being stranded in space… in a ship.

You can download the full uncompressed version of this piece including parts to make your own mix here!

This one is particularly unsettling.
Tomorrow’s piece is awesome! See you back here then! :-)